L U N A T A L K with Eva Moon

Bad-ass Bikers vs. Bad-ass Knitters

July 12, 2007 on 10:34 am | 1 person has joined the conversation. We need you too. | In Found, General Musing, WTF

This is an entirely fictional account of a supposedly true story from Portland, Oregon. Even if it didn’t happen, it should have. If you know the actual facts, please let me know. I may write a song.

A group of renegade knitters started hanging out at a local dive bar and turned it into something of a clubhouse for yarnaholics. Fuzzy coasters and beer cozies started cropping up all over the place. A pattern was emerging. The old regulars found themselves blocked by the “angora gauntlet.” Finally a group of bikers gauged the situation and decided to rip out these needle addicts before the woolly infestation completely took over. What followed was an epic Battle of the Bikers vs. the Knitters. Skeins and needles flew. Who would win? When the tangled strands finally settled, the answer was clear: The bikers had whipped the knitters asses but good.

What? Did you think this was going to have some sappy Hollywood ending?

Here are a few favorite extreme knitting projects:

Knitted ferrari – Art graduate Lauren Porter knitted a Ferrari sportscar for her honours degree at Bath Spa University.

Knitted iPhone – Step-by-step instructions included!

Knitted digestive system (Also from the same site: knitted penis cozy)

Knitted murder victims (This site has some problems but it’s worth it just to see all the adorable pink knitted bondage gear)

Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art – There’s a much larger version on the site – see every anatomically correct detail!