L U N A T A L K with Eva Moon

Cheese on Top

September 3, 2007 on 9:02 pm | In General Musing |

When I was in college I dated an Iranian guy for awhile. I once asked him his impression of American cuisine. He thought for a moment and then said, “Cheese on top.”

That was his entire summation of our food preferences, and it was remarkably apt. The French may surpass us in cheese refinement, appreciation and variety, but I doubt there’s anyone that can top the US in terms of sheer volume. American cheese consumption tripled over the past three decades to a mountainous 31 lbs per person per year, nearly a third of that mozzarella, only slightly less cheddar, followed by cream cheese and then swiss. Most of it melted.

Don’t get me wrong, I love cheese as much as the next person - perhaps more than the next three persons combined. But what have we come to when the entirety of American gastronomy can be summed up in three words?

I was at Costco yesterday, in the cheese aisle looking in vain for a package of feta smaller than a cinder block. You don’t go to Costco for cheese to eat. You go there if you want to build things out of cheese. The barrel of crumbled feta led to the invention of the cheesebag chair (on sale in the furniture dept). The log of goat cheese was massive enough to construct an entire goat.

My plea to you is to expand your cheesy horizons. Go to a cheese shop and try something you’ve never tried before: A stinky-foot Limburger, a sublime slice of aged Mimolet, a smooth smear of Humbolt Fog. Just a taste. Not on top of anything. And not melted. Hopefully your cheese shop is better-stocked than this one…

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