L U N A T A L K with Eva Moon

Ass, Elbow. Elbow, Ass

May 27, 2008 on 11:37 am | In General Musing, In the news |

From a recent story in the New York Times

When older people can no longer remember names at a cocktail party, they tend to think that their brainpower is declining. But a growing number of studies suggest that this assumption is often wrong.

Instead, the research finds, the aging brain is simply taking in more data and trying to sift through a clutter of information, often to its long-term benefit.

…for most aging adults, the authors say, much of what occurs is a gradually widening focus of attention that makes it more difficult to latch onto just one fact, like a name or a telephone number. Although that can be frustrating, it is often useful.

“A broad attention span may enable older adults to ultimately know more about a situation and the indirect message of what’s going on than their younger peers,” Dr. Hasher said. “We believe that this characteristic may play a significant role in why we think of older people as wiser.”

Ahh, I get it now. The constant wandering about the house trying to remember what I was looking for is actually a sign of broadening wisdom. This is really good news. I thought I was losing my mind. It turns out I’m expanding it. On the down side, I’ve noticed that the mind is not the only thing that expands with age. Science ought to look into the implications of this study with regard to the mind/body connection (mind/booty connection?) I’d look into it myself, but I forget.

However, in a stellar example of the broadening attention span of the aging mind in action, the above story popped back into my mind when I read this one:

The crook of your elbow is not just a plain patch of skin. It is a piece of highly coveted real estate, a special ecosystem, a bountiful home to no fewer than six tribes of bacteria. Even after you have washed the skin clean, there are still one million bacteria in every square centimeter.

But panic not. These are not bad bacteria. They are what biologists call commensals, creatures that eat at the same table with people to everyone’s mutual benefit. Though they were not invited to enjoy board and lodging in the skin of your inner elbow, they are giving something of value in return. They are helping to moisturize the skin by processing the raw fats it produces, says Julia A. Segre of the National Human Genome Research Institute.

Read that last bit again: “They are helping to moisturize the skin by processing the raw fats it produces.” Think about it for a minute. There are bacteria in the crook of your elbow that eat your body fat and moisturize your skin. It’s a body fat burner! It’s a skin moisturizer! It’s two… two…

Loitering about the crook of the elbow when they could be doing so much good elsewhere is a crime. My elbows are pretty sleek already. (coincidence?) Let’s get those little buggers on the road south. Pronto.

Whaddaya say, Science?

See more like that one:

• Hey, Science. Way to go.
• Critters are eating all my chocolate
• Eyes for guys. Dicks for chicks
• It all looked like junk
• Nigeria = Hawaii