L U N A T A L K with Eva Moon

Friday: The Gauntlet

October 1, 2009 on 8:00 am | | In Food, General Musing

Day 4 of the two-week liver cleanse I weigh in: SN+1. Damn! How is it possible to GAIN a pound when I’m eating nothing but twigs and grass?

The weekend begins with a one-two punch: Happy Hour with the girls followed by the annual City of Redmond Boards and Commissions Thank You Dinner.

I swept in to Happy Hour late and the table was already thick with frosty glasses of beer, ravaged hummus & pita plates, nachos and five happy girlfriends. Not good. I adore all these things. But I sabotaged potential sabotage by announcing my diet before even sitting down. Then I couldn’t possibly cheat because they would see. They all gushed about how great the diet was making my skin look. It was Bare Minerals Light Foundation, but whatevs. I nursed a club soda with lime for an hour.

(Pro Beauty Tip: Make a habit of traipsing about with no makeup on. Then when you suddenly appear with it on, everyone will be amazed.)

Then it was off to the lavish, star-studded Boards and Commissions dinner where I would get to hobnob with City Council members! First stop: the bar. Wine, soft drinks, water. Sigh. Can I have that water in a wine glass please? Lemon slice? Luxury! Next, the appetizer table. Last year it was cleanse-friendly poached salmon and crudites. This year? Bruschetta and brie. I scored a tiny cluster of grapes from the cheese tray and slunk away. At dinner I tucked the roll the server dropped on my plate back in the basket, ate the salad, the salmon and the three asparagus spears, left the garlic mashed potatoes (whimper!) and tried to maneuver the truffles (truffles!) behind the centerpiece at dessert time so I couldn’t hear them calling to me. My sole cheat was a splash of cream in my decaf. I did not talk about the cleanse. Not even with the Mayor.

When I finally made my escape I was feeling so pitiful and aggrieved and hungry that I drove straight to the market and splurged on a cabbage, two artichokes and a leek as big as my femur. Do I know how to live it up or what?

But the worst is yet to come.

See more like that one:

• Chopping List
• The Magi had it easy...
• Day 15: Which Way to the Egress?
• Day 13: Juice of Affliction, Chili of Salvation
• Day 11: The Wall