Not sure why sea shanties are having a moment, but I’ve always liked them and I’m not above using them for my own nefarious purposes. I invite you to sing along, but if you’re gonna, do it with gusto!

Put On Your Fucking Mask
An original covid pandemic sea shanty by Eva Moon, 2021
Download song at Bandcamp: http://tiny.cc/fuckingmask


I went to the neighborhood grocery store
Hey, ho, is it too much to ask
A naked-faced bastard walked right through the door
Put on your fucking mask

With a hey, ho, are you ready to roll
Not without your goddamn mask
With a hey, ho, go cover your hole
Put on your fucking mask

To the shithead at Costco, I said what the heck
Pull up your mask, you don’t breathe through your neck

The bitch at Home Depot was overexposed
Do you think germs don’t come out of your nose?

The post office jerk said he didn’t consent
May he end his days in an oxygen tent

The longer you fight it, the longer we’re stuck
We’re all getting sick cuz you don’t give a fuck

Please! Wear a mask and wear it properly! End the coronavirus pandemic lockdown!